Day 29

29 Jan

Dear Dad,

My house is still a wreck.  Laundry is piled in its various stages all over the house.  The floors are sticky and dusty at the same time.  And the bathroom is a disaster.

Right now, I’d burn it down and start over; with fewer things, in a smaller space, better organized.  

I’m constantly wishing I was better than who I am right now.  And hoping that I’ll reach some magical place where I’ll be the best possible me.  But I probably never will.  I’ll always want something from myself that I can’t be or do; and Lord knows that I’ll never be good enough.

I want to learn to embrace not being enough while still wanting more.  But that is really hard and something I’m not very sure how to do.  I’m starting to think, though, that doing it might be the key to living…

 

Until tomorrow,

AM

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